The Four Agreements – Book Review

I recently finished the book – The Four Agreements. It has been one that I have wanted to read for a while. I originally heard this book being discussed on the Sean and Sax Show podcast. I am a firm believer that books tend to fall in your lap when you need them the most, and this one fell into my lap a few weeks ago. This book is about four crucial agreements that you can make with yourself to make life more peaceful. 

  • Be impeccable with your word. 

When I originally heard this, I thought it meant staying true to what you are saying you are going to do. Your word is your bond. Although, it gets a little deeper than that. Through your words, you are manifesting everything. If you talk negatively and have a poor attitude, then more than likely you will keep experiencing negative actions. If you are positive and radiate good thoughts and vibrations, those will come back to you in positive experiences. Once again, it all goes back to mindset and how you look at things and the world. When crummy things are happening around me, I always like to think – “Is this going to matter in five years?” More than likely it won’t, so be mindful of what you are putting your energy into. 

“How much you love yourself and how you feel about yourself are directly proportionate to the quality and integrity of your word.” – This is a super powerful statement if you take the time to step back and really let it sink it. How much are you loving yourself today?

  • Don’t Take Anything Personally 

“The maximum expression of selfishness because we make the assumption that everything is about “me”. Even if others insult you, it has nothing to do with you. What they say, do and opinions they give are according to the agreements they have in their own minds. Whatever you feel and do is a projection of your own personal dream, a reflection of your own agreements.”

This one is huge to me. How many times do we take things personally? How many times do we assume someone else is trying to hurt us, out to get us, or even thinking about us? I can pretty much guarantee that people do not think of others as often as they think of themselves. Think about it for a minute, how often do you think about others compared to yourself? Remember, we are all raised and brought up to see the world in our own way. Don’t take things personally and your life will be a lot more care free. 

  • Don’t Make Assumptions

This one and the previous agreement almost go hand in hand. I always say, expectations and assumptions are the devil. The quickest way to ruin relationships. Instead of assuming things, ask the questions. Our assumptions are more than likely going to be wrong. Remember, we all see the world differently. So stop assuming and start asking. A trick I learned in therapy. When you aren’t sure what someone is meaning or implying, respond with, “What I am hearing you say is xyz.” This helps both parties in the conversation know if more explanations need to be made. It is amazing what happens when we start having more conversations and less confrontations. 

  • Always Do Your Best

When you do less than your best, you can experience frustrations and guilt. When you strive for perfection, you can over due it and spend more time and energy than is needed. There is a happy medium, put your best effort forward whatever that may be that day. A friend recently shared this concept with me. If all you can give is 40% that day and you give 40%, then you gave 100%. Remember that. There will be days that you can’t jump out of bed and conquer the world. But if you can get out of bed and do the one task you needed to do, well, I call that a win.

This book is a relatively easy read with a lot of good nuggets. Check it out if you have the time!

As always share some love, we could all use a little more love. 




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